So, I have been slack. Shall I blame it on the season? the weather? the ridiculous amounts I have been eating? How about all of the above. I have meant to come on here many a times and something always seemed to steal me away. Well today here I am and Im all yours computer. Thanks again for everyones on going support, it really does mean the world when I hear from you and know that you have been thinking of me. xxoo
As I start to write this, I find it hard to recall the instances where this blog was inspired from. I know what I want to say, but cant remember the stories leading up to it. Then Sam tells me he wants a freddo frog for breakfast and it all comes flooding back. I say no for a reason. And I say no quite frequently. And no matter how hard I explain it to Sam now, there is only so much he can understand, and probably a whole lot he won't understand until he is a parent himself. I was with him about a week back and he asked for a Thomas the train toy that I had already bought him for christmas, so, I said no. I was busting to tell sam that I already had it and that soon he could open it! But instead I had to listen to him cry and give me all the reasons why he needed it right then and there. I was constantly reminded that I saw the big picture and that Sam didnt. That not only did I know what was better, but I knew the timing of what was to come, and the reasoning behind it.
All of a sudden it hit me, in more than just a simple way, it struck my soul. I am exactly the same when I talk to God. I need this, if only you fixed this then my life would be this different, I need this now. God if you healed me now, then.....you get the picture. Often my prayers were giving God all the reasons why I deserved healing, why now would be a good time. When simply, God sees everything. He sees my daily struggle, and he knows the perfect timing. He knows why I am going thru this and when it is best for me to come all the way through it. He may have even planned this whole entire painful experience, to grow me and love me and shape me. Infact, I am getting to the stage where I may actually believe that this whole scenario has been part of His plan all along.
The one thing we will never ever know is Gods timing and His reasons why. I guess thats where faith is so vital. Trusting in who He is, not on what we expect from Him. Thats the rut I get into,
Dear God, I asked last week and you still havent done this yet, where are you? do you ever hear me?
Instead of resting in Gods purpose and letting Him be in control, I beg him for the thomas train that he has already got and has the perfect time to give it to me. I whinge and cry and have tantrums and He is right there saying: Lisa!!!!! I know what is coming. I have plan, a great one, just flipping trust me!! ( maybe not in those words:)
Where ever we are in life, lets be reassured that Jesus promises that He has plans for us, a hope and a future. Nothing, no one, no circumstance can take that away. Instead of expecting results from God, lets try resting in Him and reading the promises and believing them
In other news, I see Marcus this Friday, thank goodness because I am getting to be the size of a house!!! I am somewhat enjoing the food consupmtion though ;) I will write to you all after my meeting with him. Wish me luck!! All my love xxoo
As I start to write this, I find it hard to recall the instances where this blog was inspired from. I know what I want to say, but cant remember the stories leading up to it. Then Sam tells me he wants a freddo frog for breakfast and it all comes flooding back. I say no for a reason. And I say no quite frequently. And no matter how hard I explain it to Sam now, there is only so much he can understand, and probably a whole lot he won't understand until he is a parent himself. I was with him about a week back and he asked for a Thomas the train toy that I had already bought him for christmas, so, I said no. I was busting to tell sam that I already had it and that soon he could open it! But instead I had to listen to him cry and give me all the reasons why he needed it right then and there. I was constantly reminded that I saw the big picture and that Sam didnt. That not only did I know what was better, but I knew the timing of what was to come, and the reasoning behind it.
All of a sudden it hit me, in more than just a simple way, it struck my soul. I am exactly the same when I talk to God. I need this, if only you fixed this then my life would be this different, I need this now. God if you healed me now, then.....you get the picture. Often my prayers were giving God all the reasons why I deserved healing, why now would be a good time. When simply, God sees everything. He sees my daily struggle, and he knows the perfect timing. He knows why I am going thru this and when it is best for me to come all the way through it. He may have even planned this whole entire painful experience, to grow me and love me and shape me. Infact, I am getting to the stage where I may actually believe that this whole scenario has been part of His plan all along.
The one thing we will never ever know is Gods timing and His reasons why. I guess thats where faith is so vital. Trusting in who He is, not on what we expect from Him. Thats the rut I get into,
Dear God, I asked last week and you still havent done this yet, where are you? do you ever hear me?
Instead of resting in Gods purpose and letting Him be in control, I beg him for the thomas train that he has already got and has the perfect time to give it to me. I whinge and cry and have tantrums and He is right there saying: Lisa!!!!! I know what is coming. I have plan, a great one, just flipping trust me!! ( maybe not in those words:)
Where ever we are in life, lets be reassured that Jesus promises that He has plans for us, a hope and a future. Nothing, no one, no circumstance can take that away. Instead of expecting results from God, lets try resting in Him and reading the promises and believing them
In other news, I see Marcus this Friday, thank goodness because I am getting to be the size of a house!!! I am somewhat enjoing the food consupmtion though ;) I will write to you all after my meeting with him. Wish me luck!! All my love xxoo
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